Date 411: The transition from "I" to "We"

"I love you … but I love myself more." How many times have you used this line in real life apart from Sex & the City Trivia? It is what happens when someone other than Samantha Jones realizes that she has worked too deeply. When you suddenly realize that you have entered into a relationship that you are not yet ready for because you are not yet fully acquainted with .

Let's rewind first and go through an important "must" before you get overwhelmed. Your first real relationship that breaks away from death to death is the relationship with you.

With this dynamic, your basic colloquialism revolves around terms like "Ich-Zeit", "Mein Tag" or everything that only refers to individual terms. This selfish nature complicates meeting a potential person because your pronunciation changes. It must be.

Let us now go through some phases, which we all gradually go through in relationships. If you draw their attention to yourself, hopefully you will be prepared for the bumpy transition from "I" to "We". Do not worry. I will try to make the trip as smooth as possible.

Conversation phase

Depending on your personality and sexual frustration, this can take between 2 days and 4 months. At this point, you feel so comfortable with "I" and "Mine" that it is almost as if this new person is entering "your" space. But you want them there, which means you have to learn to deal with and compromises … a little. You're still far from the Carrie / Aidan feeder, so hold on to your heels and don't flee to Starbucks yet!

Cooling down phase (note: pants are still on)

This phase can also last anywhere between days, weeks and months, provided we control our insatiable but completely natural sex drives. Ladies, I know you have some patience in these groin muscles! Remember it is more than a middle fold and you want to get to know it for its other attributes. This is the time when you pull out the whip and open your mental list: humor (check.), Chivalry (check.), Family closeness (check.), Intelligence with humility (eh, a second. Okay, check.) These are the ingredients that lead us to the third phase.

Let's start the dance phase

Okay, you've waited long enough. I am sure that you are relieved. Smaller striptease attacks are therefore permitted in phase 3. It is even more important, however, that you unknowingly feel comfortable near you and your friends . It has left an impression on you (and you) that has taken so long, and your singular pronunciation is beginning to fade.

Jumping ship (you went overboard!)

Maybe head over heels? Oh my god, the butterflies flutter like crazy and you wobble out of your mind because you fell for this potential "someone" They say "we". You know, it's almost as monumental as "I love you", but if you go from "I use my oven to hold my magazines" to "we love to host dinner parties", you know that something has shifting within you and now it's time for the magic .

make sense? If you are aware of the process that arises when you move from singlehood to blending hood, you are all the better prepared for the transition. I am talking about the transition that takes place internally when you change your independent language mentally, spiritually and emotionally into a language characterized by dependencies. It will take some time to get used to it, but if it is worth it, you will know it and it will be a smooth sailing. Have a nice trip to Chicas!

Are you currently working on me or us?

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